still no baby

hi all. just a quick note to let you know that although contractions and cramping have increased, there's still no baby at this time. I am alternating between extreme shock that there will soon be a baby and disbelief that a baby will ever arrive (we've been waiting for so long that it's just surreal to think that soon--very soon--the waiting will be over). last week when I was washing all the baby laundry I realized that it really felt like playing house or laundering doll clothes. it's hard to fully understand the concept that a real human being will soon be wearing those clothes--someone with a life and a history who will learn and grow and walk and talk and eventually hate me and blame me for all of her problems! my own mother cursed me many times by telling me, "Leila, some day I hope you have a daughter just like you!" can't wait.